The Loss Team of AllenAuglaizeHardin Counties
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Self Care

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Each person experiences their loss in their own way, in their own time. Many articles have been written to assist those mourning the loss of their loved one to suicide. Suggestions that may help for you to get through your day as written by Iris M. Bolton, entitled "Beyond Surviving: Suggestions for Survivors" include:
  • Know you can survive: you may not think so, but you can.
  • Struggle with "why" it happened until you know longer need to know "why" or until YOU are satisfied with partial answers.
  • Know you may feel overwhelmed by the intensity of your feelings but that all your feeling are normal.
  • Anger, guilt, confusion, forgetfulness are common responses. You are not crazy, you are in mourning.
  • Be aware you may feel appropriate anger at the person, at the world, at God, at yourself. It's okay to express it.
  • You may feel guilty for what you think you did or did not do. Guilt can turn into regret, through forgiveness.
  • Having suicidal thoughts is common. It does not mean that you will act on those thoughts.
  • Remember to take one day at a time.
  • Find a good listener with whom to share. Call someone if you need to talk. 
  • Don't be afraid to cry. Tears are healing.
  • Give yourself time to heal.
  • Remember, the choice was not yours. No one is the sole influence on another's life. 
  • Expect setbacks. If emotions return like a tidal wave, you may be experiencing a remnant of grief, an unfinished piece.
  • Try to put off major decisions.
  • Give yourself permission to get professional help.
  • Be aware of the pain in your family and friends.
  • Be patient with yourself and others who may not understand.
  • Set your own limits and learn to say no.
  • Steer clear of people who want to tell you what or how to feel.
  • Know that there are support groups that can be helpful.
  • Call on your personal faith to help you through. 
  • It is common to experience physical reaction to your grief, e.g. headaches, loss of appetite, inability to sleep.
  • The willingness to laugh with others and at yourself is healing. 
  • Wear out your questions, anger, guilt, or other feelings until you can let them go. Letting go doesn't mean forgetting. 
  • Know that you will never be the same again., but you can survive and even go beyond just surviving.
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         ADDITIONAL ARTICLES          
​THAT MAY BE HELPFUL
Survivors of suicide Loss Fact Sheet
BIBLIOGRAPHY - SUICIDE BEREAVEMENT
TIPS FOR SUICIDE SURVIVORS
SURVIVING A SUICIDE

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   ​Find a good
              listener -             Call someone if
   you need to talk


NATIONAL AND STATE RESOURCES
American Foundation for Suicide Prevention
SUICIDE Prevention Resource Center
AMERICAN association of suicidology
The jason foundation
the trevor project
the dougy center
the ohio suicide PREVENTION foundation

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​LOSS Team
ATTN: Chris Estes
309 West High Street 
Suite A
Lima OH, 45801
419-549-8530 x4
DOSS Team
ATTN: Rick Skilliter
309 West High Street
Suite A
LIma, Ohio 45801
419-549-8530 x9
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www.pvff.org
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www.wecarepeople.org
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